14 November 2021

Back again: November 2021

Hello again.


It has been very, VERY long since my last post and for the sake of avoiding a cliche recollection of how, why and what exactly happened in my life: I shall in stead bullet-point my past 8 years.


Since 2013 my boyfriend and I

* got Engaged * Married * had our first (and only) Child*


After January 2016

* I developed Post-Partum depression

* Found out I have Adult-ADHD

* Found out that I am Autistic ( kind of a shocker!)


Several other things happened in between, including:

* marital issues * high-conflict Divorce mediation, starting 2021 * child custody evaluations *

* an enormous amount of Animosity in the household * Hurt, Sadness * and Healing! *



These past 5 years have been an extremely difficult process and many times I felt helpless and flooded by all the uncertainty and tons of Social confusion. I'm often exhausted.

But. I manage to find new sources of recovery, energy, assistance, great guidance, good emotional support... and a little bit of Magic ;)

Since our son was born I studied self-healing methods, I read books on EQ (Emotional intelligence), found ways to clear my mind and still have times where I fall down and have to get back up, but the difficult times occur less frequently and the intensity is less and shorter-lived. So, I grow more hopeful.

I found essential assistance in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Youtube videos (on various subjects) and discovered a tool called Enneagram coaching :)

I struggle through Motivational speeches and religiously take my ADHD medication. ALL of this helps. I keep ALL the big and little tools that help me to get better and then i lose them in the clutter and later find them again

The new-found guidance on my future path makes me excited and creates passion and energy for me to tackle this future :)

Now I am re-inventing myself and I have asked: "What IF i feared Nothing! " and lo and behold, I am starting to discover a way of achieving this No-fear mindset. A new "Life Magic".

The story continues and I will not find enough time to write all that I wish to, but I attempt to record most of it and distill what I have learned in the past 10 to 12 years into blog posts. Things have been extremely tough and I still have ups and downs, but with reduced intensity. The down times pass faster.

I celebrate every small Improvement, even when others refuse to acknowledge or appreciate it!

And I start to find more hours of Fearing Nothing!


So, I sign off by saying I wish you all the very best and many moments of feeling Strong. It is not always possible, but at some stage it will be if you only hold on.



WhyNot

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